It's been called "The Mommy Wars" and whether we think we fight in the war or not, we have all felt the effects of it.
Ever compared yourself to another woman? Ever felt doubt in your abilities? Ever felt the need to defend your choices?
I have. I have recently had to defend my choices and felt the need to educate other women about some of my beliefs. It makes me feel uncomfortable and I worry that I stepped on some toes. I won't go into details, but it has led me to contemplate why it is that we women continuously compare ourselves to others.
The truth is, no loving mother who is doing the best she can would ever make a decision to intentionally harm her or her family. So why do we judge other women who are doing what they think is right for them?
I think it's because when we see someone choosing something that we wouldn't or didn't, that that somehow makes us feel like maybe we aren't on the right path ourselves. Consider the following debates:
Homebirth vs. hospital birth.
Breastfeeding vs. formula feeding.
Stay at home mom vs. working mom.
Home schooling vs. public schooling.
No vaccines vs. full vaccinations.
Big family vs. no or few children.
Whole foods vs. fast foods.
The list could go on . . . .
It doesn't matter which side you're on, as long as you are doing the best you can and recognizing that so is most everyone else. Let's not compare ourselves to others who either live in a way we never would or appear to be doing it all better than us. Remember that some women don't necessarily have the blessings in life that enable them to make the choices they would otherwise. Don't fret about all the things you would improve if only you had more time, more money, more energy, more support, better health, less stress, etc.
Motherhood and womanhood are joyous challenges. Let's spend our energies loving our families and blessing our homes. Focus on the joy in your life. Strive to improve where you need to. Give others the benefit of the doubt.
Let's stop the fight.
1 hour ago